一、亲，这边建议你重新接受九年义务教育呢。
Dear, it is suggested that you receive nine-year compulsory education again.
二、您的学历是胎教吧！
Your educational background is prenatal education.
三、路遥遥，水迢迢，把你扶上墙了你还往下掉
The road is far away, and the water is far away. I helped you to the wall and you fell down生旦净未你Sheng Dan Jing Wei you
四、你在数学界和字母界排行第二
You rank second in mathematics and letters
五、你想走，什么时候都可以；你想回来，抱歉，没那个可能
You can go whenever you want; You want to come back, I"m sorry, that"s impossible
六、你以为有了钱就会向你想象中那样快乐吗？不，你错了。有钱人的快乐，你根本想象不到
Do you think you will be as happy as you think if you have money? No, you are wrong. You can"t imagine the happiness of the rich.
七、好喜欢你，想和你一起坐过山车，在最高的位置解开你的安全带
I like you very much and want to ride a roller coaster with you and unfasten your seat belt at the highest position.
八、说话归说话 别嗲嗲的 我脾气受不了 你要小心了啊
Speak as you speak. Don"t be angry. I can"t stand my temper. You should be careful
九、难不成青梅绿茶出新品了 味这么浓 吃了几袋茶精啊
Is there a new product of green plum tea? How many bags of tea essence did you eat with such strong taste
十、别人有的气质 而你有的是杂质
Others have temperament and you have impurities
十一、自作多情，孔雀开屏
Love yourself, proud as a peacock
十二、白里透红，与众不同
White and red, different from others
十三、我好想请你去体验一下KTV 知道啥是KTV吗 就是k你一顿 再T你一脚 最后我再做个v的手势.
I really want to invite you to experience KTV. Do you know what KTV is? It"s K, then T, and finally I"ll make a V gesture.
十四、妹妹多少钱一瓶啊 还批发吗 市场价多少啊 青梅绿茶有你好卖吗
How much is a bottle of sister? Is it still wholesale? What is the market price? Is green plum tea easy for you to sell
十五、今天刚买了一瓶红茶味的香水 专治绿茶味．
I just bought a bottle of black tea perfume today to treat green tea.
十六、奥斯卡怎么没给你颁个最佳绿茶奖呢.
Why didn"t Oscar give you the best green tea award?
十七、臭鱼烂虾一点档次都没有。
Stinky fish and rotten shrimp have no grade at all.
十八、朋友的话你确实不配，不过当宠物的话还是可以的。
You really don"t deserve to be a friend, but you can still be a pet.
十九、姐姐你是不是太看得起自己了
Sister, do you think highly of yourself too much
二十、可真是出淤泥而不染呢，宝贝
It"s really muddy, baby
二十一、你就像根苦瓜，穿得这么清凉，长的这么败火
You are like a bitter gourd, dressed so coolly and growing so weak
二十二、国家怎么没拿你的脸研究防弹衣。
Why didn"t the country study bulletproof vests with your face?
二十三、别紧张，我又不是什么好人
Relax, I"m not a good person.
二十四、怎么着我的东西更好用？我嚼吐的口香糖你要不要？
What? My stuff is better. Do you want the chewing gum I chewed?
