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真幼稚！什么事都想靠打架解决！
How naive! Everything depends on fighting!
东风吹，战鼓擂，长得不行你怨谁。
The east wind blows, the war drums are beating. Who do you blame if you don"t grow well.
每次看到情侣在树上刻下名字，我就会陷入深深的沉思，为什么有那么多人带着刀子去约会。
Every time I see a couple carve their names on a tree, I get into deep meditation on why so many people go on a date with knives.
在金钱和尊严之间，我选择了保留了尊严，因为我相信下次能卖个更好的价钱。
Between money and dignity, I chose to keep dignity, because I believe I can sell it at a better price next time.
感情里的认真就好像玩了一场游戏，你练到满级，而他删了游戏。
The seriousness in emotion is like playing a game. When you reach the full level, he will delete the game.
有人说，凡事都是船到桥头自然直。可你这体重，没到桥头船就沉了。
It is said that everything is straight when the boat comes to the bridge. But you"re so heavy that the boat sank before you got to the bridge.
我不在你身边，你要照顾好自己，记得按时喝酒，不舒服多抽烟。
I"m not with you, you should take care of yourself, remember to drink on time, feel uncomfortable and smoke more.
这个世界好奇怪，贫穷限制了我的想象力，却限制不了我的体重。
It"s a strange world. Poverty limits my imagination, but not my weight.
普通物品价格后面加一个零的，叫名牌。后面加两个的，叫奢侈品。
The price of ordinary goods with a zero is called a famous brand. Those with to more are called luxury goods.
曾梦想仗剑走天涯，后来手机没电不去了。
I once dreamed of going to the end of the world with my sword. Later, my mobile phone was out of power.
把电视拆了，我爸对我说：你若安好，便是晴天，你若安不好，小心锤死你。
After the TV was removed, my father said to me: if you are safe, it will be sunny. If you are not safe, be careful to hammer you.
不要怪别人以貌取人，毕竟心太远脸就在眼前。
Don"t blame others for judging people by their appearance. After all, the heart is too far away and the face is right in front of you.
上帝给你关上一扇门，总会为你在墙上留下很多开锁的电话号码。
God closed a door for you, always leave a lot of unlock phone numbers on the wall for you.
（图片和素材源自网络，侵权联删）
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